la bella vie bella :)

hello everyone :) another sunday, another poem. this one is older but i loved it, when i found it in my diary. january took some hard turns, i have just decided to stir the wheel back into direction podcast. i love to throw away all the stonesthat have been placed in my way. there is a nearby pond, can you hear it? i've heard the stones you throw there sink so deep, not even sea lions can get there. so listen, release. i wish you a great week.

all the love & all the best, bella

heya i'm back :) sneaking in quietly. it's winter and i'm sliding down a hill of well being - or at least i'm trying.

this is a poem, what might call it affirmations, i think all spoken words have the power to be.

walk with me through a glistening forest of dreams. i wish you a blissful start of theyear. stay with yourselves, hug yourselves from the back & feel the warm embrace. i greet you highly and i wish you all the love and support. stay soft, stay weak, stay flexible in who you are. bend like a flower in the winds. stay yourselves.

truly, bella

my dear listeners, whoever you are, i m very glad that you decided to tune into this episode of my podcast. as you all might know, i love doing this podcast, lately i have been feeling as the idea shifted. i am not the one to tell the world how it works but i let the world speak to me, without disruption. really focussing on what life has to say. which feels like a rollercoaster of love, fear, loosing reality, loosing the purpose of life, just to find it again - in short healing trauma. for me it is time to unmask. to be my authentic self, without wanting to perfect things, without wanting to hekp somebody for inner valaidation, without feeling like i have no worth, if i do something that makes me happy. i am learning to worship life. i am learning to find healthy devotion for mother earth, for myself. i am trying to find balance, still integrating softness. this is why i don't want to dump knowledge on you that my body doesn't feel the need to speak about. i don't want to be a recycling bin. i want to feel safe in the now, home in the now, every now, like i am wanted in every moment. this means healing & this means facing my shadow. this is why the podcast became so unregular. i am trying to butterfly up. i still feel deep love for you, i am just trying to find the love for life & myself as well.

farewell, see you in the next episode (which will come!), heal & #staytuned 3

hello again, i am in a leaving mode today. leaving my volunteering, leaving my body, leaving old stories behind.

i am CLOSING CHAPTERS - for real. this is a very deep insight into me not knowing shit but trying to find comfort in that & growing & growing & growing.

a little introduction into the supernatural & my experiences with loosing sense of self & security in breathwork sessions and finding a very deep fear behind that. i feel like everything i am doing is overcoming fears, do you want to join me?

feel the love in your heart, you deserve it 3 & most important of all #staytuned :)

so the -log series is going on very frequently! this episode is super chaotic & the name of the episode very broad, i just felt like simple today. thanks the you for letting me share the life that i am living, it's super fun & really helps me with doubts of being on the right path, because if you talk into a microphone it always feels important.

in other words: thanks for letting me feel important! my inner child couldn't be happier about that.

so u guys, #staytuned for more self obsession but also for the normal episodes, because i think i just fell in love with my mic again 3

or welcome to my a-log! i'm cool like that now, opening up about my feelings on the internet. i just feel like it's time for me to get real and not just to teach everybody but to show that i am a very much a very student. this episode is me telling you about my most recent lessons from life, that i am trying to figure out, this is also me admitting that i might never get to a state of perfection. this is me trying to embrace softness in my life - but be careful, my inner child might just come around and drive over your left food on her cool motorcycle.

anyways, enjoy ur day my friends, love yourselves gently & above all #staytuned